If you judged my life on my last few posts you'd say life is pretty darn good. And in all honesty, I can't disagree with you, but I will tell you there is more than meets the eye. I'm very blessed. I have an amazing husband, a wonderful family, genuine and fun friends, the list goes on. But life is not without it's trials, frustrations, and don't forget the heartache.
I have always heard about Mt. Bonnell. It's a tourist spot here in Austin that overlooks Lake Austin to one side and downtown Austin to the other. With Dave and I both growing up around Austin and now living here almost 5 years we couldn't believe that neither of us had ever taken the time to go up there. So we decided that Saturday morning was just the time. We woke up early (6:30! On our one day to sleep in) and we headed out.
The views were truly amazing! After our morning at Mt. Bonnell, we went and got breakfast tacos, ran errands, he studied, I went to my parent's and swam with the dogs and then we ended the night with a dinner date. On the way to dinner I was thinking that it had been the perfect day!
I really needed Saturday. I had started to feel sorry for myself and there's no time for that! I've been plagued with a series of mishaps that are just life, but I've been letting it weigh on me. In January, we had a huge water leak from our upstairs bathroom that resulted in a lot of damage, we've had a lot of car repairs/general maintenance, my jewelry was stolen out of my checked baggage on our way to Savannah (I know I should have put it in my purse...), I was completely scammed by a carpet cleaning company, and I had 4 chairs recovered...got there to pick them up and they had been recovered in the wrong fabric. AND, it was my fault. :( I had to repurchase new fabric and have them re-done. Sometimes, life gives you lemons...
And, if you're still reading...and you hadn't guessed by my semi-vague posts before, we have been dealing with infertility for quite some time now. The lost jewelry and the very expensive fabric/furniture mishap seems fairly insignificant doesn't it? Of course it does, and it is all completely insignificant when compared to the one true desire of my heart. I want to be a mother more than anything. I dream about what our kids would look like and what kind of father Dave would be. But I know God is sovereign and He has a plan for our lives.
Here's the facts...some days are harder than others. Some days I just want to go to bed because it seems like "this one's just not in the cards" and maybe tomorrow will hold a different story. But I'm loved, I have friends praying for me and for Dave and for what our future holds. I pray we have a family. I pray on my hands and knees...sometimes my praying is more like begging. But I know that my story is written by the master story teller. And truthfully, in the last 3 months He has filled me with so much peace about our situation.
So tonight, I'm praying for a baby, I'm praying for whoever took my jewelry that was not theirs, I'm praying for my luck to change, and in an effort for it to not be all about me...because really, it should be all about HIM, I'm praying that I will see the beauty in my "average" life. Because He intended for me to live each moment for Him. There are blessings all around me...literally ALL around me. And I'm so grateful...here's to an ice cold glass of lemonade made straight from those fresh lemons!
Ps...if this entertains anyone even a little bit....Dave is such a good sport. My camera was balancing on a rock and my backpack to take this picture of us on self-timer. He just expects this from me. :)